


A Quiet Childhood

by Tachi_Sakon



Series: The Childhood AdaGinko Collection [2]
Category: Mushishi
Genre: Adashino finds out what Mushi are, Adashino/Ginko, Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Alternate Universe - Pre-Canon, Angst, Childhood Friends, Curses, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Meetings, Friends to Lovers, Ginko gets a friend, Hurt/Comfort, Idk how to write child Ginko, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Other, Pain, Physical Abuse, Pre-Slash, Slash, Slow Burn, im doing the best I can here so give me a break, injuries, long chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-11
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:34:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26397244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tachi_Sakon/pseuds/Tachi_Sakon
Summary: The boy seemed interesting enough:()”Maybe I should talk to him,”()But more than that, the boy seemed lonely.
Relationships: Adashino & Ginko (Mushishi), Adashino/Ginko (Mushishi), Nui & Ginko
Series: The Childhood AdaGinko Collection [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1926481
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	1. First Meeting

_  
_

_The sky was grey and the world was misty, the clouds sinking to the ground and weaving through the twisting willows.  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“I’m bored..” a child’s voice echoed through the forest. “There aren’t any kids my age here..”_

_  
  
_

_As the mist cleared a bit, a figure could be seen: a tall dark haired boy wearing a blue yukata was strolling down the grey paths, his hands folded behind his head as he hummed to himself.  
  
_

_  
“There’s nobody but weirdos here..” he muttered. “And old geezers that yell all the time.”   
  
  
_

_He continued to walk down the path before stopping at a little clearing.  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Ah,” he gasped before ducking behind a nearby tree. “It’s him!”  
  
_

_  
Past the clearing, there stood a slightly shorter boy with Snow White hair, wearing a tattered beige yukata with ripped sleeves, gripping a small sphere in his hands as he stood barefoot on the rocks that divided the clearing from a small creek.   
  
_

_“He’s there again..”  
  
_

_  
The dark haired boy watched the white haired boy with a frown as he stared, unblinking into the abyss._

_  
_ _  
_

_“He’s always there,” he muttered to himself from where he stood behind a tree, gripping I trunk with his small hands. “By himself.. I wonder what he’s doing?”_ _  
_

_The tall boy weighed his choices. “Maybe I should talk to him..?” Then he shook his head, his dark hair swishing and eyes squeezed shut as he ducked behind a tree branch, as if talking to the white haired boy was the impossible. “I can’t do it..”  
  
_

_But.. he wanted to know.  
  
_

_The boy seemed interesting enough.  
_

_“I want to ask him,” he whispered to himself. “I really want to ask him!”  
_

_The boy seemed quiet. He seemed like the kind of person who wouldn’t be bothered by him or if he were to ask a question.  
  
_

_“Maybe I’ll get him to talk, Ive never heard him say anything.”  
  
_

_But more than that, the white haired boy seemed lonely.  
  
_

_“He’s always alone,” he muttered, “so maybe he’ll talk to me!”  
  
_

_So he decided to give it a shot.  
  
_

_Takin a deep breath, the dark haired boy slowly walked out from behind the tree. Cupping his hands around his mouth, he called, “Hey!”_

_He watched as the white haired boy jolted ever so slightly and craned his neck to look around, staring with his one eye into the forest, his mouth slightly agape before shrugging and turning back to stare out at the grey lake, a_ _soft, “Eh..?” leaking from his parted lips.  
  
  
_

_The dark haired boy purses his lips and slowly walked towards the clearing, stopping behind the other boy.  
  
_

_  
“Hey,” he asked tapping him on the shoulder, “hey, you?”   
  
_

_The white haired boy finally faced him and the dark haired boy’s eyes widened._ ‘He’s normal looking..’ 

_The white haired boy had long white bangs that covered the right side of his face, a rounded nose, thin pale lips, and one dull teal eye.  
  
_

_  
  
_

_The two gaped at each other in silence before the white haired boy’s lips formed the smallest grin the dark haired boy had ever seen in his life._

_  
“Hi,” the other boy whispered, his voice soft and light. “Do you need something?”_

_  
  
_

_  
The taller boy shook his head. “No,” he answered. “Just came to enjoy the view.”   
  
_

_  
  
_

_The white haired boy nodded slightly and turned back to the lake. “It’s pretty, isn’t it?“  
  
_

_“Sure.”_

_  
  
  
_

_“Yeah,”_

_  
  
After more silence, still being fixated on asking the white haired boy what had been on his mind since the first time he’d seen him, the dark haired boy blurted: _

_“Where’s your other eye?”_

_  
  
_

_  
The white haired boy never turned around to face him, still staring out into the distance, only a small “Huh?” answering the dark haired boy’s outburst.  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“I asked,” the dark haired boy repeated impatiently, a bit frustrated with the white haired boy for dismissing him and not facing him when talking, “where’s your other eye!”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Oh,” The white haired boy blinked at Adashino with his one blue eye before shrugging nonchalantly and whispering, “Don’t have one.”  
  
_

_“What do you mean, ‘don’t have one’?!”  
  
_

_“Exactly what it sounds like, don’t have one.”  
  
_

_“But everyone has both eyes!”_  
  


_“I don’t.”  
  
_

_The dark haired boy was completely confused. He was also irritated with the white haired boy and his short answers that didn’t tell him anything. More importantly, how could someone only have one eye?_ _Everyone that he knew had two eyes, even his old grandpa!  
_ _  
_

_  
  
_

_“It’s impossible to not have boy eyes,” he repeated sternly.  
  
_

_The white haired boy heaved a quite sigh. “No it isn’t,” he muttered softly, his rounded face framed by messy white hair, “because I don’t have both.”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“It’s probably just hidden behind your hair— no?!”_ _The dark haired boy trailed off with a squawk and stared incredulously at the white haired boy as he shook his head. “Are you serious?”  
  
_

_  
“Do I look like I’m joking?”   
  
_

_The dark haired boy sighed, “I guess not, then..”_

_The two went back to staring at the lake.  
  
_

‘How boring, I thought that he’d be more interesting than this.’ _The dark haired boy sighed again and settled down on the cold rock, crossing one leg over the other, his toes dipping into the clear lake water, creating wide ripples._

_  
  
“Do you really think that the lake is pretty?”   
  
_

_  
“Huh?” The dark haired boy craned his neck to look up at the white haired boy. He looked a bit downcast, making him frown. “Why do you ask?”   
  
_

_  
He was answered with a shrug. The dark haired boy bit on his bottom lip before grabbing the white haired boy’s hand. Resisting the urge to say “God! Your hands are so tiny!” the dark haired boy pulled again on the delicate hand of the other boy.  
_

_“What are you doing?” The white haired boy muttered as the taller boy pulled him down.  
_

_“Sit,”_

_“I can do that without you pulling on me, you know.”  
_

_His ears perked, the other sounded amused at him. “No, I don’t.” The dark haired boy huffed, pulling harder on the other’s hand, not caring in the slightest if he was hurting him. “So sit.”  
_

_The white haired boy sighed and slowly lowered himself to sit beside the dark haired boy, his hand still in his grasp.  
  
  
_

_  
  
_

_The white haired boy hummed quietly, his fingers twitching in the dark haired boy’s grip. “When are you going to let go?”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Of these tiny things?!” The dark haired boy stuttered, cheeks flushed slightly and he let go of the other’s hand quickly. “Right now!”  
  
_

_The white haired boy chuckled quietly, his voice light and calming. He sat beside the other boy, dipping his toes in the water and waving his legs back and forth, creating small currents and causing the water to slop, splashing his yukata.  
  
_

_“Aren’t you worried about getting wet when it’s so cold?” The dark haired boy asked.  
  
_

_The white haired boy shook his head. “No,” he mumbled, “it doesn’t matter to me.”  
  
_

_“Ah,”_

_Then: “What’s your name?”  
  
_

_“Why do you need to know?”  
  
_

_“Don’t you tell your name to the people you meet?”  
  
_

_“Not really,” the white haired boy replied, “I don’t really meet that many people.”_

_“Oh, right..” The dark haired boy through for a moment before huffing and looking back out at the lake, “Well, tell me anyway.”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_The white haired boy looked down at his feet, his gaze downcast. “.. inko...”_

_“Huh?”  
  
_

_“Ginko..”_

_“Cool, I’m Adashino.” The dark haired boy replied. “Nice to meet ya.”  
  
  
_

_  
Ginko nodded with the small jerk of his head, “Likewise.”_

_“So,” Adashino hummed leaning back on his hands, “I’ve been meaning to ask,”_

_“You’ve been asking me things this whole time, through.” Ginko muttered under his breath, thankfully on deaf ears. He sighed again and continued to slowly move his feet through the heavy water, shoulders relaxing. He gave a small shrug and inclined to Adashino with his head, "Ask away, I guess."  
  
_

_“Why are your feet so scratched up?”  
  
_

_Ginko froze for a brief moment before swallowing nervously and plunging his feet into the lake, splashing Adashino in the process.  
  
_

_“Hey! What was that for?” Adashino groaned glaring at Ginko, holding his splattered yukata in between his fingers. “I’m wet now!”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“....”  
  
_

_“Hey,”_

_“What?” Ginko muttered, refusing to meet Adashino's gaze.  
  
_

_“Is it possible that the other's beat you?”  
  
_

_“How did you come to that conclusion?” Ginko sighed. “I told you that no one ever talks to me."  
_

_  
  
_

_Adashino shrugged. “Dunno,” he said, “I was just wondering, and it seemed possibe.”_

_“No it doesn’t,” Ginko whispered._

_Adashino frowned and whirled around to face Ginko, irritated with the shortness of answers and less of the elaboration. “Then why are your feet all scratched up?” He demanded, pointing at Ginko’s feet. “Explain!”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_Ginko clenched his fists. “.. From running.” he ground out.  
  
_

_“Running? Running from what?” Adashino asked, glancing at Ginko with raised eyebrows. “What’s there to run from here?”  
  
_

_Ginko sighed and continued to stare at his feet that were plunged into the lake, swirling them around and shook his head. “Forget it,” he whispered, “it’s nothing.”  
  
_

_Adashino stared at Ginko in disbelief. “Man, you sure are confusing!”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“I am?” Ginko hummed, finally looking up at Adashino, his teal eye shining with slight amusement.  
  
_

_“Very!”_  
  


_“I see.”  
  
_

_Adashino nodded with a huff as he watched Ginko raise his feet from the water, his gaze Harding suddenly. His new acquaintance’s feet were all scarred and scratched up, long, deep lines covering every inch of pale skin. “That looks like it hurts,” he said._

_  
Ginko nodded absentmindedly, curling his toes. “It does sometimes,” _

_“Why not wrap them then?”  
  
_

_“Don’t have anything to wrap with,”_

_Adashino felt anger coursing through him and shot up from his seat to his feet. “That’s it!”  
  
_

_Ginko looked up at him, single eye wide. “What’s it?” He echoed quietly. “What’s wrong?”  
  
_

_Adashino reached down and grabbed Ginko’s arm, pulling him up with him. “That’s it!”  
  
_

_“What?” Ginko asked again as Adashino began to pull him from the clearing, his grip tight and unforgiving. “Where are you going?”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“I’m taking you to get some help!”_

  
  


“ _I don’t need it.”  
  
_

_  
“Yes you do!” Adashino snapped, pulling Ginko harder. “First the eye and bow the feet?! Really?!”   
  
_

_  
  
_

_“I don’t need help,”_

  
  


_“It doesn’t matter, you’re getting some!”  
  
_

_“No.”  
  
_

_Adashino spluttered and lurched, nearly falling forwards. “Hey!” he hissed looking back over his shoulder to see that Ginko had dug his heels into the ground. “What the hell?!”  
  
_

_“I don’t need your help.” Ginko whispered, shaking his head and tugging his arm out of Adashino’s grip. “I’m going back to the lake.”  
  
_

_“No you aren’t!” Adashino made a wild grab for the other’s arm again, only to miss. He watched as Ginko slowly backed away, retreating to the clearing by the lake. “Why won’t you accept the help?” He called after him. “What’s the matter with you?!”  
_

_  
“You wouldn’t understand..” Ginko’s soft voice replied from the mist as he backed away, leaving Adashino panting and gaping after him. “Leave me alone.”   
  
_

_Adashino gritted his teeth and stomped his foot. “Fine!” he yelled into the forest. “Fine, be that way! See if I ever come back to help you ever again!”  
  
_

_  
He was met with silence.   
  
_

_“I’m never gonna talk to you again, Ginko!” Adashino yelled again, turning on his heels and stomping down the opposite path without looking back. “Never!”  
  
_

_  
But as Adashino neared the village gates, he knew that was a lie. In reality, he had grown attached to Ginko in the short time they talked. Well, in the short time he’d been talking, anyway. The scars on his feet worried him, and they looked infected.   
  
_

_  
“He says that he doesn’t have wrapping,” he muttered under his breath as he stomped into the village premises, “as if he expects me to believe that!”   
  
_

_“Adashino!”  
  
_

_The dark haired boy looked up with a grimace from where he was glaring at the ground. “Geh,” he groaned, his shoulder slumping as he watched a figure stomp towards him, “old man..”_

_“Where the hell have you been, you good for nothing problem child?!”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“I was taking a walk, old man.” Adashino sighed. He couldn’t tell him about his meeting with Ginko, it felt like a bad idea. “Is that against the rules too?”  
  
_

_“Don’t use that damn tone with me!” The elderly man yelled back, waving his garden hoe in the air at Adashino. “Hurry up and get your ragged ass over here!”_

_“Okay, okay,” Adashino muttered under his breath as he trudged up the path and towards the hut behind the old man, “I’m coming.”  
  
_

_  
It was best to keep about his meeting with Ginko quiet, he felt. Maybe the beating wouldn’t take as long if he’d lie. He though back to the scars on the white haired boy’s feet and wondered if he had more of those somewhere.   
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Maybe it was a good idea that he didn’t come with me...” Adashino whispered as he was pulled into the hut by the arm. “He’s smart, keeping himself away from here..”_

_“Kneel boy,”_

_A much familiar command to Adashino. Sighing, the dark haired boy clenched his fists and kneeled down on one knee._

_“Show me your back.”  
  
_

_He untied his yukata and let it fall from his shoulders, pooling at his waist.  
  
_

_“Count.”  
  
_

_Adashino bit his lip. Yup, that Ginko kid was much smarter than he was, staying away. A scream nearly ripped itself from his throat as the first lash came down on his thin back.  
  
_

_“I said count.”  
  
_

_Taking a ragged breath and blinking back tears, Adashino whispered, “One,”_

_Thankfully, it didn’t last as long as he thought.  
_

_Good thing he kept his meeting quiet.  
_


	2. Healing Isn’t Always Possible (Part 1)

_The next day, Adashino was so sore that he could barely bring himself to stand up._ _Everything ached and throbbed, everything stung from the ointment he had rubbed into his back the night before and the wrapping he’d done felt so tight that it was hurting his ribs. But that’s what he got for being too hasty, he supposed. He sighed tiredly and stood slowly up to his feet.  
  
_

_  
  
_

_This sucked and he got what he deserved for not telling his ‘family’ that he had went on a walk. He got what he deserved for meeting the strange white haired, one eyed boy at the clearing._

  
  


_But even so, Adashino found his thoughts always migrating back to Ginko. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but Adashino had the gnawing feeling that there was more to the boy’s injuries then what met the eye._   
  
  


_“Damn it,” he muttered as he limped out of the hut, desperate to get away from the old man and his family, “he didn’t have to lay it down that hard.”_   
  


_Despite his words from yesterday, Adashino was going back to see Ginko. He had to know where those scars on his feet came from and why he didn’t take care of them._   
  


  
  
  


_“He’s probably at the lake again,” Adashino decided, “staring at it or something.” He slipped on his sandals and draped his haori over his shoulders. “But, it’s not like I’m going there to see him! I’m going to check for my missing stick bug, yeah.”_

  
_He grabbed the wrapping from the ground and stuffed it into his pockets. “To fix the cage that I’m gonna put it in,” Adashino muttered to himself, “to tape up the wood..”_

_  
  
  
_

_Adashino heaved a sigh.  
_

_  
Who was he kidding? He was going back to the clearing.  
  
_

_  
“I’m gonna see if I can get him to let me take a look at his feet.”   
  
_

_  
Today, he was going to help Ginko help himself. He was going to help those infected scars heal, to make sure that Ginko learned how to keep his injuries safe, to help him because he needed to ease the worry bubbling up in his chest._

  
_  
_   
  


_“Will this much be enough..?” Adashino muttered to himself, tapping his chin with his index finger and pursing his lips. “I’m not sure of half a roll is enough for two feet..”_

_He closed his eyes and tried to picture Ginko’s feet in his mind. If he recalled correctly, the white haired boy’s feet were quite small and delicate; tiny and thin toes, a medium arch and bruised heels, the skin all over his feet covered in scars, burns and blisters. Adashino winced mentally._ _“How can he even walk like that?” He muttered. “It looks painful..”_

  
  
  


  
_**“Doesn’t it hurt?” Adashino had asked, glancing at Ginko out of the corner of his eye.  
  
**_

_**  
  
  
** _

_**Ginko shrugged, swishing the water with his feet. “Sometimes.” He mumbled. “I’m used to it, there’s not much I can do about it anyway.”** _

  
  


_The way Ginko so easily dismissed his own troubles and discomfort, as if they were unimportant; a waste of time to address.  
_

_  
“He pisses me off,” Adashino hissed under his breath, “that one eyed bastard.”   
  
  
_

  
  


_He stilled, his hand hovering over another roll of wrapping, fingers twitching._ _“But if I take too much wrapping, he’ll notice and I’ll get another beating...”_ _Adashino gritted his teeth. It didn’t matter if he was beaten for helping Ginko. He’d probably get in trouble for just going to see him, forget taking too much wrapping. He reached for the second roll, grabbing it and stuffing it into his pocket. “I think that two rolls are enough..”_

  
  
  
_Nuzzling into the haori draped over his shoulders, Adashino dashed out of the hut without bothering to warm the household that he was leaving.  
  
_

_  
  
  
_

_He had to get to Ginko.  
  
_

_He had to do his best to help him if he wasn’t going to help himself._

_  
  
_

_“It’s snowing...” the dark haired adolescent murmured looking up at the sky. “Walking barefoot in this weather isn’t the best thing to do..”  
  
_

_‘_ Poor guy,’ _Adashino pursed his lips with a shiver,_ ‘always barefooted.. Maybe I should’ve brought him a pair of geta too..‘

  
  


_“Oh well, it’s too late to go back now.”  
_

_And without sparing a glance back at the village, Adashino rushed past the hut and out the gates, into the forest as fast as his legs could carry him through the piling snow, pockets bulging with ointments and wrapping.  
  
  
_

_  
“I’m going to give the lonely weirdo some actual care!”_

_And Adashino swore to keep that promise.  
  
_

* * *

  
  
  
_Panting and gasping for air, Adashino sighed in relief as he finally reached the clearing where he met Ginko the day before._ _His eyes darted from side to side as he searched for the familiar white hair and dirty yukata, desperate to find his new friend.  
  
_

_  
  
Not that he would ever admit that aloud though. He’d never call Ginko his friend to his face, for now only in his mind._

  
  


“ _Hey, one eyed bastard!” Adashino yelled into the clearing. “Come out!”  
  
_

  
  


_  
“Calling my name would’ve been just fine too, you know.” The all too familiar soft tone replied. “And I thought that you said you won’t come back.” _

_Adashino scoffed as he neared the lake, watching as Ginko emerged from behind an old willow, his blue eye glistening and yukata as dirty as ever. “I think that one eyed bastard pretty much sums you up,” he nodded, “and that doesn’t matter, I’m here anyway.”_

_  
_ _Ginko shrugged calm as ever. “Call me whatever you want if it makes you happy,” he whispered.  
  
_

_“I’ll take you up on that, so don’t forget that you said so.”  
  
_

_“Don’t worry, I won’t.”  
  
_

_Adashino grinned and Ginko replied with a small twitch of his lips before walking over to the taller adolescent and tilting his head.  
  
_

_“What’s that bulge in your haori?” Ginko hummed, pointing at Adashino’s pockets that were stuffed to the brim with wrapping and ointments.  
  
_

  
  


_“I brought some stuff to help you with your feet— y’know, since you said that you don’t have any wrapping, I decided to bring some.” Adashino explained taking Ginko’s hand and leading him over to the rocks rimming the lake, pulling him down as he sat on the snow. “Here, look—” the brown haired adolescent said as he took each ointment from the pocket of the robe, “I brought these.. they help with blisters— and this helps with infected cuts, and this with scarring.”  
  
_

_  
Ginko watched Adashino lay out the medical equipment curiously, single eye wide with surprise. “Woah...” he whispered, reaching out to finger a small glass bottle. “You brought all this with you?”   
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Yeah, I figured that I could give it to you.”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_  
“Why?”   
  
_

  
  


_“What do you mean, why?” Adashino stared at Ginko, slightly annoyed and shocked. “For your feet! Doesn’t it bother you?”_

  
  


  
_Ginko nodded slowly, a sheepish blush creeping onto his cheeks, the usually pale skin tinted pink. “Sort of...”_

  
_“And walking like that it the snow!” Adashino added, pointing at Ginko’s feet. “Look, they’re blue! That can’t be healthy!”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“I just never bothered..”  
  
_

_  
“I can tell,” Adashino scoffed crossing his arms over his chest.   
  
_

_Ginko sighed and shook his head. “It’s not worth it,” he muttered looking away from Adashino’s face, his blush widening as he realized that the taller teenager was still holding onto his hands, “I don’t need it.”  
  
_

_Adashino refused to believe a single word. “Yes you do,” he said firmly, “so don’t try to weasel out of this. I’m going to wrap up your feet this one time and then you’ll do it yourself.”  
  
_

_“What about you,” Ginko muttered, “what about your injuries?”_

_Adashino hummed, letting go of Ginko’s hands and stood up before bending over and wrapping his arms around Ginko’s torso, hefting him up from the ground and sitting him atop a boulder. “Just shut up for a second, will you?” He asked and moved to sit himself down lower than Ginko, kneeling in front of him before taking a small foot in his lap. “Let me do my thing.”  
  
_

  
  


_Ginko shook his head quickly and hopped off the boulder, pushing Adashino away from him. “I told you that it’s fine, I don’t need your sympathy.” He sighed, stretching his arms behind his back with a small groan and a visible grimace that Adashino didn’t miss. “Besides,” he mumbled glancing back at the other adolescent, “what happened to your back?”_   
  


  
  


_Adashino froze, his eyes going wide before he blinked and snapped out of it, laughing shakily. “What are you talking about?“ he asked Ginko, waving a hand dismissively. “Nothing!”_   
  


  
  


_Ginko raised a single eyebrow and pointed at Adashino. “You’re bleeding through the fabric,” he whispered, his voice shaking ever so slightly as he placed a hand on his shoulder, “that can’t be nothing..”_   


  
  


_“Listen, I don’t get why you’re suddenly so interested,” Adashino hissed at Ginko, who recoiled but still kept a hand on his shoulder. “I told you that it’s nothing!”_   
  


  
  


_“And you think that I believe you,” Ginko murmured softly, his entire being giving off an upset sort of air, “while you’re bleeding through your clothing?” He looked down, his teal eye shining with what seemed like tears to Adashino. Gripping tighter at the taller boy’s shoulder, Ginko whispered, “I’m just worried.”_   
  


  
  


_“I don’t need you to worry about me!”_   
  


  
  


_“But—”_

  
  


_Shrugging his shoulder from Ginko’s prying hands, Adashino faced him with a frown. “I don’t need someone who doesn’t know how to treat his own wounds to worry about me,” he argued. The taller adolescent clenched his hands into fists as Ginko stared at him, clearly upset. Ignoring the guilt that he was feeling by yelling at the white haired boy who meant no harm, Adashino turned away from Ginko, letting his back face him. “I won’t accept any advice from you,” he muttered, “not until you take my help.”  
  
_

_Ginko removed his hand from Adashino’s shoulder with a small whine, now clearly upset and disgruntled. “It’s not that I don’t know how to treat wounds,” he whispered, Adashino stilling in front of his before turning around to face him, shock clear on his face.  
  
_

_“So you know how to treat wounds?” Adashino gasped.  
  
_

_Ginko nodded, “I don’t recall telling you that I didn’t. All I said was that I didn’t have wrapping.”  
  
_

_“Then why didn’t you do anything?!”  
  
_

_“Who ever said I didn’t?”_   
  


_“I don’t understand,”_

_“Maybe if you let me talk, you would.”  
  
_

_  
“I don’t think so,” Adashino hissed, “I don’t think that I’ll understand you ever.”   
  
_

  
  


_Ginko winced, shoulders slumping and lips downturned. “Maybe,” he muttered anyway, “you’re right..”_

_Adashino reached for Ginko’s hands, grasping the smaller ones in his bigger ones, pulling the white haired adolescent closer to him. “Okay, maybe I didn’t word that right.. but I don’t want you to keep on neglecting yourself.” He murmured. “It’s not healthy.”  
  
_

_“What are you,” Ginko whispered, his breath warm against Adashino’s neck, “a doctor?”  
  
_

_Adashino grinned. “Aiming to be,” he answered easily.  
  
_

_“Doctors don’t wander into a forest in blood soaked haoris to yell at a stranger that they met the day before,”_

_“This doctor does.” Adashino murmured, hugging Ginko closer. “So, are you going to tell me why you can’t take care of your feet?”  
  
_

_“That’s it,” Ginko’s voice mumbled, muffled by Adashino’s yukata, “I can’t.”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Elaborate,” Adashino replied, “tell me why.”  
  
_

_“There’s nothing to elaborate, I just can’t.”  
  
_

_  
Adashino sighed. He felt that there was more to Ginko’s words, but he decided not to pry; seeing that the white haired adolescent was clearly distraught, he simply continued to hug him.   
  
_

_  
  
_

_“What about you..?”  
  
_

_“What about me?”  
  
_

_Adashino yelped as he felt two hands place themselves on his back, sinking into the blood that had seeped into his yukata.  
  
_

_“Your back,” Ginko whispered clutching at Adashino’s yukata, “you don’t get that from falling.”  
  
_

  
  


_“I didn’t fall,”_

_“Were you beaten?”  
  
_

_“Why do you—”_

_  
  
_

_“Were you?”_ _Ginko’s grip on Adashino tightened when he looked up to see the taller teenager nod. “I’m sorry..” he whispered._

_  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Why are you apologizing, it wasn’t your fault.”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_Ginko remained silent before croaking, “It’ll scar,”_

_“Yeah, I know..” Adashino sighed. “But this isn’t the first time.”  
  
_

_“That’s something we have in common then,”_

_“Oh really?”  
  
_

_Ginko fell silent again.  
  
_

_Adashino chortled, “You’re a man of little words, huh?”  
  
_

_“I guess you could say that,”_

_Adashino hugged Ginko for another moment longer before they both slowly unraveled from each other and pulled apart.  
  
_

_“Sorry about that,” Ginko sighed, “I don’t usually do stuff like this, hugging strangers.”  
  
_

_Adashino slapped a hand to his chest in mock hurt. “You think I’m a stranger?”  
  
_

_Ginko shrugged, “We only met yesterday.”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“You’ve got a point.”_

_  
Then: _

_“So about your feet—” Adashino began, before Ginko cut him off with a one eyed glare.  
  
_

“ _I told you, there’s nothing that you can do.”_

_  
  
_

_  
“Impossible,” Adashino declared, “there’s always something to be done!”   
  
_

_“You’re a hypocrite, aren’t you?”  
  
_

_“No!”_   
  


_“Yes, yes you are.”  
  
_

_  
  
Adashino humphed and pursed his lips. “Whatever,” he huffed pointing at the boulder beside him, “just sit down!”   
  
_

_  
  
_

_Ginko tilted his head, “Why..?”  
  
  
_

_  
“I’m gonna wrap your feet, that’s why.”   
  
_

_“But—”_

_“Just so they don’t get even more infected!”  
  
_

_  
Ginko nodded slowly and walked over to the boulder beside Adashino, gently settling down on top of it, his feet just barely touching the floor. “There,” _

_Adashino knelt in front of Ginko with a sigh once again and took one of his scarred feet in his lap, careful to not aggravate the marred skin. Grabbing a roll of wrapping from next to him, the tall adolescent glanced up at Ginko who was staring down at him, expression indifferent. “I’m gonna start,” he said, “tell me if it’s too tight.”  
  
_

_  
Ginko nodded wordlessly and Adashino’s attention went back to his foot. The doctor wannabe unraveled the wrapping and with the other hand grabbed one of the ointments, unscrewing the top before dipping a finger inside.   
  
_

“ _Watch closely,” Adashino told him. Ginko nodded again. “First, I put the ointment on the wounds near the ankle—” Adashino gently spread the medicated substance on Ginko’s foot, “then I rub it in.” Adashino hummed softly as he ran his hand along the petite foot, unconsciously tracing the scars.  
  
  
_

_  
  
Ginko hissed through his teeth as the ointment stung. “.. Ow..“   
  
_

_Adashino glanced up quickly, halting his motions. “Sorry, you okay?”  
  
_

_  
  
  
_

_“Yeah,”_

_  
  
_

_“Can I continue?”  
  
_

_  
  
Ginko nodded giving him the okay, his hands clutching at the hem of his yukata and lips set in a thin line. Adashino frowned as he looked back down at the foot in his lap and continued from where he left off.   
  
_

_How long had Ginko left these unattended?  
  
_

_  
This didn’t happen overnight.   
  
_

_“Am I hurting you?”  
  
_

_A shake of the head. With one slight glance up at Ginko’s face, Adashino knew that was an instant lie. The white haired adolescent was still looking down at him as indifferent as usual, but if he looked closely, Adashino could see the slight pained twinge to his usually calm gaze.  
  
_

  
  


_“Tell me if I do,” he decided to say, running his fingers along the arch of Ginko’s foot, “okay?”_

_A swift nod.  
  
_

_“Don’t stay quiet.”_

_Another nod._

_“If you tell me when it hurts, I’ll let you help me.”  
  
_

_Ginko looked down at Adashino from where he sat atop the boulder, eyebrow raised and eye shining. “Promise?” he whispered softly, his grip on his yukata tightening noticeably.  
  
_

  
  


_“Yeah,” Adashino nodded. “But only if you let me help you.”  
  
_

_“That’s what you’re doing now, aren’t you?”  
  
_

_  
  
_

_Adashino rolled his eyes and shook his head with a sigh. “Just promise.”  
  
_

  
  


_Ginko remained silent for a moment before slowly replying, “.. I promise..”_

_  
_

_“Okay, good..” Adashino grinned. “Because this is gonna take a while.”_

_  
_

_  
  
_

_  
“A while..?”   
  
_

_  
“Yeah, and we both have plenty of time!” Adashino sang as he caressed Ginko’s foot. “Rest assured!”   
  
_

_  
“I don’t know if that’s possible,”   
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Don’t be such a negative one eyed bastard,”  
  
_

_  
Ginko heaved a sigh, quickly snapping his mouth shut as Adashino’s ointment shot tingles through his foot, biting on his lip to keep a wince from escaping. If this was healing, then he thought that he’d be better without it. Without the extra pain, without Adashino wasting his time on something that wasn’t possible. His heart clenched at the thought of Adashino finding out about his eye, about why he was always alone, about why he didn’t need his help. He didn’t want to loose the only friend that he’d managed to make after so many years—  
  
_

_  
  
_

_  
  
“You said that you’d tell me if I’m hurting you,” the taller adolescent’s voice interrupted his thoughts. “You promised.”   
  
_

_  
  
Ginko’s gaze slowly went back to the dark haired male kneeling in front of him. “But it doesn’t hurt,” he muttered.   
  
_

_  
“Your face was all scrunched up.”   
  
_

_  
“I was thinking.”_

  
  


  
  


_Adashino snorted as he began to wrap Ginko’s foot, starting at the ankle and slowly working his way down. It irked him how gentle he was being with some kid that he met yesterday versus how he’d wrapped himself the day before, nearly dying in the process. But here he was, gently holding one of the small feet in his hands, carefully wrapping the injuries.  
  
_

  
  


_  
“Hey,” Ginko’s soft voice murmured.   
  
_

_“Hmm?” Adashino answered without looking up. “What is it?”  
  
_

_  
“It’s not always possible.”   
  
_

_  
“What’s not always possible?” Adashino frowned and looked up at Ginko who was staring out at the lake, his head turned, face covered by white bangs.   
  
_

_Ginko sighed and closed his eye, still facing the clearing. “To heal.”  
  
_

_“I don’t understand,”_

_But Adashino did understand. That meant that his efforts were futile.  
  
_

_  
“It’s not always possible to heal.” Ginko whispered. “That’s why I’ve been telling you that I don’t need it.”   
  
_

  
  


_Adashino’s eyes widened. “You mean—” he began, abruptly stopping as the white haired adolescent nodded slowly.  
  
_

_  
  
_

_“Yeah... I’m a lost cause.”  
  
_

_  
  
“Why would you say that?!”   
  
_

_  
“Because I am,” Ginko sighed, “and there’s no reason to lie to myself. My feet won’t heal and neither will my eye, that’s all there is to it.”   
  
_

_“You haven’t tried!”  
  
_

_Ginko’s shoulders slumped. He really should give up on explaining to his new hard headed friend that he tired and found out that there was no way to heal._

_  
  
_

_  
  
“There’s no point,”   
  
_

_  
“There’s always a point!” Adashino hissed back. “You’re just not trying hard enough!”  
  
_

_  
**How do you know?** Ginko wanted to shout. **What do you know about me to say that? Do you even know why I’m saying this? I’ve tried plenty of times and hard enough, but it hasn’t worked. If it had, I wouldn’t be here.** But instead, he simply continued to stare into the distance with a sigh.   
_

_  
  
“Say what you will, but that doesn’t change what you see.” Ginko replied softly. “I’m a lost cause and healing isn’t always possible.”_


	3. Healing Isn’t Always Possible (Part 2)

_Adashino couldn't believe what he was hearing, or rather, he refused to believe. He was sure that he hadn't heard right. Ginko wasn't thinking, he was just splurging nonsense, that's all it was._

  
  
  


_"You don't know what you're saying," the dark haired adolescent hissed, his grip on Ginko's foot tightening. "You're crazy."_

  
  


_Ginko shrugged still staring out intro the distance as if this were a conversation he'd had many times. "Just because you don't understand doesn't make me crazy."_

  
  


_Adashino shot up to his feet, dropping Ginko's foot from his hands. The other's words were making him angry. He refused to believe that anyone couldn't be healed, that's why he was going to become a doctor. He was going to give everyone a chance to heal and he wasn't going to let anymore innocent people suffer losses. "No one's a lost cause!" He shouted. "Everyone has a chance!"_

  
  


_"If everyone had a chance," Ginko whispered, "then I wouldn't be alone."_

  
  


_Adashino's mouth immediately clamped shut at Ginko's words. He promptly froze and stood staring at Ginko who had curled up in front of him, hiding his face in the sleeves of hisdirtied yukata._

  
  


_"I didn't think—" he began softly, twiddling his fingers and fidgeting with the ends of his haori._

_Ginko slowly uncurled himself and nodded, his eye clouded over with silent anger and darkened with sadness. "That's just the point," he whispered, voice raw, "you didn't think."_

  
  


_"Ginko..." Adashino murmured reaching out to place a hand on his friend's slumped shoulders. "I—"_

  
  


_"Don't touch me.. please." Ginko's soft voice replied. "Just don't."_

  
  


_Adashino's face reflected hurt as Ginko recoiled away from him, burying himself deeper and deeper into his yukata as if trying to hide himself from the taller latter. This in itself hurt Adashino more than the scars on his back. The fact that Ginko was hiding from him illuminated his distrust and potential fear. The doctor wannabe reached forwards again, this time his hand making contact with Ginko's shoulder._

  
  


_Ginko shifted uncomfortably, glaring weakly at Adashino. "Don't touch me," he sighed straightening up, his back cracking slightly. If he hadn't been staring at the white haired boy, his eyeswould have missed the way Ginko flinched quickly as he stood on his feet, the snow mushing up against his bruised skin._

  
  


_But now, Adashino had a whole new problem._

  
  


_It wasn't just Ginko's feet that were hurt, there were other places too._

  
  


_Places that he most likely would not let Adashino look._

  
  


_Wounds that had been engraved into his skin just as Adashino had happening to him._

  
  


_Wounds that he wouldn't let Adashino see._

  
  


_The taller adolescent's mind swarmed with his and Ginko's voices from their previous conversation:_

  
  


_**Ginko remained silent before croaking, "It'll scar,"** _

_**"Yeah, I know.." Adashino sighed. "But this isn't the first time."** _

  
  


_**"That's something we have in common then,"** _

  
  


_What did he mean by that?_

  
  


_" **That's something we have in common then,"**_

  
  


_Did Ginko get beaten like he did?_

  
  


_Maybe it was worse for him?_

  
  
  


_But he doesn't seem to have any family around him._

  
  


_" **I'm always alone."**_

  
  


_He was always alone._

  
  


_" **You're a man of little words, huh?"**_

  
  


_" **I guess you could say that,"** _

  
  


_Adashino stood gritting his teeth as he clenched and unclenched his fists, his lanky form trembling with anger. He wasn't trusted, that much was clear._

  
  


_But he needed to be if he was going the help his new friend. He needed to be trusted if he was going to learn more about the white haired adolescent who currently stood hunched up and turned away from him._

_He had to be or else his heart would burst._

_(Or else he'd lose the only friend he's ever had.)_

_"Ginko," Adashino murmured, catching the white haired adolescent's attention._

_Ginko made a small noise of acknowledgement but still did not turn to him, stubbornly refusing to meet his eyes._

_Adashino rolled his eyes and took a step towards the white haired adolescent, hesitant but firm. Sighing softly when Ginko hadn't seemed to mind, neither nodding at him or flinching away, he took another step._

_And another—_

_And another._

_Until finally, he was standing positioned behind Ginko, looking down at him._

_**"Say what you will, but that doesn't change what you see." Ginko replied softly. "I'm a lost cause and healing isn't always possible."** _

_Adashino gritted his teeth._

__

_   
  
_

_" **There's always a point!" Adashino hissed back. "You're just not trying hard enough!"**_

_He was convinced that he was right. There would always be a point of trying, there was always a way to help someone. He wasn't becoming a doctor for nothing!_

_He hadn't left his hometown for nothing._

_He hadn't witnessed his mother dying in his arms for nothing._

_He hadn't met Ginko for it to end in nothing._

_" **Don't be such a negative one eyed bastard** ," _

_Don't be so negative—_

_" **I don't know if that's possible,** "_

_Anything is possible—_

_" **You haven't tried!** "_

_You just have to try!_

_"You just gotta try!" Adashino yelled, lunging at Ginko, throwing his arms around the shorter teen and trapping him in a lock hold._

_Ginko's gasp was so soft that not even the hummingbirds could hear it. Adashino tightened his grip as he felt the other jump— clearly startled and not expecting him to do this— and pulled him back, arms wrapped around his waist. The taller teen marveled silently at Ginko's structure. Instead of skinny and weak as he had labeled him as, the white haired adolescent was more slim and lean, with the slight definition of his muscles and bones._

_He was so— he was so.. so..._

_Delicate._

_Among all the words Adashino could use to describe Ginko, delicate was the one words that captured him all._

_".. What are you doing?" Ginko whispered, bringing his hands up to place them over Adashino's arms, nudging them slightly irritated._

_Adashino blurted, "Keeping you from running away so that I can help you!"_

_Truthfully, that is what he was trying to do by holding Ginko still. He was keeping the other here with him, refusing to let go until his confusions would be cleared._

_And only Ginko could clear them, so he wasn't going anywhere until Adashino was satisfied._

_"I'm not going to run,"_

_"How am I supposed to know that the moment I let go you won't disappear?"_

_"I'm not going to disappear."_

_Adashino held fast as Ginko began to work on prying himself from his arms. "I'm not letting go until you trust me enough to let me help you!" He yelled into Ginko's back, mushing his face into the delicate dam of soft skin covered by the dirty layers of frayed cloth. At this point, he didn't care if he was hurting the other, he just wanted to keep him here with him. "I won't let you go," he whispered, "not when I know that I can help you."_

_Ginko's breath hitched, catching in his throat. It was then when he realized that Adashino was someone who truly cared for him, that his new friend genuinely wanted to help him. Tears stung at the corner of Ginko's single teal orb as his heart clenched painfully, his hands grasping at Adashino's arms. The white haired teen but his trembling lower lip and hung his head, his struggling ceasing abruptly. He didn't know if the tears welling up in his eye were those of sadness, frustration or happiness, but his chest felt warm at the thought that Adashino cared about him when no one else had in a long time. Ginko decided to stay quiet and clamped his mouth shut, biting deeper down into his lip, drawing blood. For if he tried to speak, he felt as though he was going to burst into tears. Something he hasn't done since he had to leave Nui._

_"I'm becoming a doctor so people don't have to suffer," Adashino whispered hoarsely, "and that includes you, no matter what you say."_

_Something wet plopped down landing on Adashino's wrist._

_"Huh?" The tall teen blinked. "Is it raining?" He looked up form Ginko's back, eyes wide as ginko trembled in his arms. "Ginko?"_

_"Do.. do you.. mean that?"_

_Adashino's heart nearly cracked. The white haired teen's voice sounded so broken. Had he been crying? Was it because of him? Wait— Ginko could cry?!_

_Ginko's trembling intensified as soft whimpers escaped him. "Do you really mean that..?" He repeated softly, choking on a wail. "Really?"_

_Adashino nodded. "I mean it," he said with a note of finality in his voice. "I said that I'd help you, so I will. And I plan on healing you fully."_

_Adashino's voice was too loud for Ginko. It seemed as though he was yelling in his ear even though they were whispering. His words rang around through his ears and his head, making him immensely happy._

_Fully... he promised to head him fully, he said._

_Healing fully was something that Ginko couldn't fathom._

_Healing..._

_Healing was a concept that Ginko didn't understand._

_(Him healing me—)_

_Adashino healing him was something so unexpected that he hadn't thought it was possible._

_Until now, that is._

_And all in a split second, the dam broke._

_"You..."_

_The tears fell—_

_"I—"_

_His voice cracked, and his heart shattered._

_Slowly and agonizingly—_

_  
After moments and moments of gasping and choking back sobs, Ginko managed to collect himself enough to croak, "I'm going to be healed?"_

_Painful silence followed his outburst before the arms wrapped around him tightened ever so gently._

_Adashino's heart raced and thumped, leaping into his throat and echoing in his ears, blood pumping so wildly that it made his world spin rings. His pulse rang throughout his body as adrenaline courses through his veins. Hugging Ginko closer to him, grasping his torn yukata tightly in his fists, nearly swallowing the shorter teen in his embrace, Adashino nodded._

_He nodded and he nodded and he nodded until he could nod no longer. Grabbing Ginko’s hands, he spun him around so that they were facing each other, staring intensely into each other’s different toned eyes, Adashino still wrapped around Ginko’s leaner form._

_**Yes... yes, yes, yes, yes.** _

_“Ginko,”_

_**I will heal you.** _

_“You don’t have to suffer alone anymore,”_

_**I’ll suffer with you. What fun is it suffering alone like two losers? Might as well do it together.** _

_“Because I’ll take away all the weight on your back and help you carry it.”_

_**I’ll be the pillar to your monument**._

_“It might not be easy,”_

_**It may even be impossible—** _

_“But I swear that we’ll always be together.”_

_Adashino watched, a smile slowly creeping across his flushed face, as Ginko’s trembling and swollen lips— from biting on them, which **I have to get him to stop doing** — stretched into a wide smile to mirror his. _

  
  


  
  


_With a startle, Adashino’s mind made a shocking discovery and realization:_

_This was the first time he’d seen the usually stoic and melancholy teen genuinely express any form of emotion beside indifference._

_This was the first time he’d truly shown Adashino how he looked when he smiled; how happy he felt._

_Adashino nearly cooed at the sight. Ginko’s cheeks— only now could Adashino see that they had a slight chubby look to them— stretched slowly into the form of a shaky smile as his lower lip trembled from holding back wails and sobs. His visible eye was crinkling with held back tears and mixed emotions of happiness and the need to cry, his cheeks were flushed and tear streaked, droplets still falling from the real eye._

_The sight nearly broke him._

__

_The sight made him want to scream—_

_To cry,_

_To laugh—_

_To smile..._

_(Which he did.)_

  
  


_“You know,” Ginko whispered softly, happiness seeping into his tone for the first time in a long while, “you might be right: healing could be possible.”_

_Adashino snorted as if he hadn’t just been debating on whether to scream or cry or laugh and buried his face back into Ginko’s soft white tresses, hugging him, never wanting to let go of his friend._

_“Of course I am! I’m a doctor and doctors always find a way.”_

  
  
  


_**I’ll find a way to heal you, Ginko.. just you wait—** _


	4. To Stay

The next time they met was just like the others; Adashino pestering Ginko about his eye and whatnot, while the white haired teen did his best to stick with short and vague answers.

  
  


This time the two teenagers were sitting on an old strip of cloth, that Adashino had managed to nick from his foster family, and pointing out shapes that the fluffy white clouds above them formed as they swirled and mingled. 

“You still haven’t answered my questions!”

“You ask too many,”

Adashino huffed and frowned at the stoic teen and crossed his arms over his chest as Ginko sighed. Adashino wasn't going to leave him alone, not until he told him something about himself at least. People like this— people like Adashino that cared, were people that he rarely had anything to do with. Most of the people, or should he say, the few that had noticed him, were harsh and condescending people. They didn't care about him, they didn't want to know more about him and they never stayed for too long, often never coming back after the first meeting. But people like Adashino, he'd only met one other like him: a boy named Isuzu. Ginko had forgotten how he looked like, since it's been years since he'd seen him. He often wondered if Isuzu was still out there, telling his stories like he used to do as they sat by the lake and looked at the sky, waiting the summer days away. He was probably still alive and out there somewhere following the rivers and telling stories. Ginko sighed. Isuzu must have forgotten about him a long time ago. People like him didn't stay in people's minds for too long, most people he'd met tended to forget him after three days. But not Isuzu, who had found him sitting in a pond and playing with the sickly koi. Isuzu, who had helped him with his troubles. Isuzu who had listened to him, who had tried to heal him. Isuzu who had cared. And now he had Adashino— a tall, messy and dark haired doctor wannabe who wouldn't leave him alone, who had met him as he sat by a lake in the snowy clearing and had talked to him. Adashino who had somehow befriended him and managed to hold actual conversation with him. Adashino who had remembered him and came back. Adashino who took a liking to him.. Adashino who genuinely cared. Adashino who saw him as a friend, who got angry with him because he cared. Adashino who put effort into helping him heal even when it was pointless.

Adashino who made Ginko think: Maybe healing isn't so impossible, after all.

But the force of the everlasting darkness in Ginko's mind began to tug at his heart, swarming around his chest, telling him that he shouldn't get too used to such things.

_That's right,_

Ginko grit his teeth as Adashino pulled him back in his arms and sat them down onto the snow. He suppressed a shiver as chills tingled through his body as his bare skin sank into the snow. He was cold, even though he'd never payed it no mind, this was his first time feeling cold. Feeling anything but numbness.

_I should tell him to leave._

Ginko placed his hand over Adashino's.

_It's better if we part ways now.._

Slowly, he began to pry the other's clutching fingers from his yukata.

_It's for the best,_

Or so he tried to convince himself.

_For the best._

"What are you doing?" Adashino's voice hummed, muffled by his back. Ginko's breath hitched as he felt the taller teen lift his face from his back, his hands slowly turning Ginko around in his arms to face him, curious brown boring into dull deal. Adashino's brows furred as he watched Ginko squirm and avoid his eyes. "You aren't trying to get away, are you?"

Ginko could practically see the wheels in Adashino's head turn as they stared at each other; Adashino gripping Ginko and Ginko trying to get away. The white haired adolescent swiped his tongue over his bitten lower lip before turning away from Adashino and hanging his head.

".. Maybe." 

Adashino unwrapped one of his arms from Ginko's waist and cupped his cheek with one hand, stroking the pale chubiness, still marveling at how someone who looked so frail could have such rounded cheeks. ' _Off topic, off topic!'_ Adashino's mind screamed. ' _Get back to the matter at hand!'_

Adashino sighed and tilted his head, fingers still stroking Ginko's left cheek.

_He's trying to run.. But—_

"Why?" 

Ginko shrugged and moved his cheek away from Adashino's palm. "Do you want an honest answer?"

Adashino nodded, "Yeah."

That's when Ginko realized that he didn't have an honest answer to give. What would he say? Would he have to explain his entire situation, even though he didn't remember anything before the age of ten? What was he going to tell him.

How was he going to be honest if he didn't know?

He didn't know... that was it. That's how he would answer honestly.

Ginko's teal eye stared at Adashino, cold and dull, his soft voice carried by the wind as he whispered, "I don't know," the white haired teen watched as Adashino blinked at him, puzzlement clearly defined on his boyish face. So he repeated, "I don't know."

"How can you not know?" Adashino frowned. "You said you'd be honest!"

"I am being honest."

"No you're not! You can't just try to run away and when someone asks you why say I don't know and expect them to believe you!"

"I really mean it, Adashino." Ginko whispered. "I don't know."

Adashino desperately searched Ginko's face for any signs that what was happening had to be a joke. His eyes flickered back and forth across and along the other's face, wide with disbelief as Ginko's single eye closed in defeat and his head drooped. "You can't not know," the doctor wannabe whispered to himself repeatedly, "you _have_ to know.."

"But I don't."

"But you have to!"

_You can't keep on like that, not knowing._

"I know that you know!" 

Ginko stilled and slowly craned his neck, eye narrowed at Adashino.

_What do you know?_

Adashino glared back, grasping Ginko's hands as the other tried to yank himself free. 

_I know more that you! You can't be asking me that when you don't even know why you're trying to run, when you don't know how I can help, what real friendship is like._

"I'm not letting go!"

_What do you know._..

"Yes you are."

_I know more than you! All you know is how to shut people out!_

"Adashino," Ginko trailed off and let his arms drop slack after his sides, Adashino's hand still grasping him.

_Will it hurt to stay?_

Adashino understood. He shook his head and pulled Ginko back towards him, hugging the white haired boy again and resting his chin atop his head.

_Not at all, because I'll be with you._

"Don't run,"

_I'm not going anywhere._

"We're friends aren't we?"

_Friends don't leave each other._

Ginko nuzzled into Adashino's chest. "Friends..."

Adashino nodded and began to thread his fingers through Ginko's hair. "Yeah," he whispered, gently rocking them back and forth, making the other in his arms sleepy, "and I won't be leaving you alone anytime soon. At least, not until you give me some answers and your feet heal."

Ginko forced himself to chuckle weakly, leaning with his entire weight— which wasn't very much— onto Adashino. "That's reassuring," he muttered under his breath.

"That's because it's true." Adashino replied easily, stroking Ginko's white hair and untangling the dirtied strands. "Plus I'm a good friend!"

"You sure are."

“There you go again!” Adashino groaned. “Acting like that!”

Ginko sighed, “Sorry.”

Adashino waved a hand, accidentally tugging Ginko’s hair as he forgot that it was still tangled in the white strands, success’s earning a yelp of surprise from the usually emotionless male.

“What was that for?” Ginko hissed looking up at Adashino, eye gleaming as though it were made of glass.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to.” Adashino replied with a shrug, going back to gently running his calloused hands through Ginko’s hair. “Accident.” 

Ginko frowned and reached up, grabbing a fistful of Adashino’s hair before giving it a sturdy yank, smirking softly as the taller teen yelped in pain.

“What the hell, Ginko!” Adashino groaned as he looked down at Ginko, who couldn’t keep his lips from twitching. “Why’d you do that?!”

“Accident,” Ginko echoed with a shrug.

“‘ _Accident_ ’ my ass!”

“Accident.”

It was Adashino’s turn to sigh as he leaned down and bonked their foreheads together, resting his against Ginko’s, gazing into the single teal eye, face softening the longer they looked at each other. “Whatever, I’ll say it was an accident.” The doctor wannabe murmured. “But only this one time, okay?”

Ginko sighed and let Adashino nuzzle their noses together, something they did when they had nothing to say to the other but needed to relay what they felt. “Okay.”   
  


Adashino smiled at Ginko brightly and cupped his face in his hands, letting their foreheads stay rested together and noses squished against each other, eyes closed as they stayed close together. Moments like these were what Adashino enjoyed most and kept engraved in his memories for days and days later. Moments like these that Adashino found endearing and looked upon with fondness for Ginko.   
  


Moments like these that they treasured close to their hearts.   
  


The moments when they stayed together and simply held each other, enjoying the day without any cares or worries. Where they were just two lonely teenagers looking for company in each other’s arms, where they could just be two normal boys, where they could just be.

  
  


Moments they both loved, but would rather die before admitting it to the other.   
  


_Yes_ , Ginko decided. _Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if he were to stay._  
  


_Maybe having Adashino around wouldn’t be so bad at all..._


End file.
